Monday, November 11, 2019

MTVZ: Issue #21 (November 2019 with Big Chungas on the cover)

NEW NEWS:
We have a tag-line for MTVZ.

MTVZ: LEAVE IT ON


So now we can market MTVZ a lot better because we have a tag-line.

MORE NEW NEWS:
Back issues of MTVZ are now available!!

MTVZ Issue #15 (September 2018 with Skeletor on the cover)
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLE2yvLFuEX-jGsRwt6MiK09XzTq-dAu0q

MTVZ Issue #18 (March 2019 with Steven Tyler and Oprah on the cover)
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLE2yvLFuEX-hKq1bUxibxZKnrUSycQs2d

Not sure how many more of these will ever happen, but here is the latest and greatest edition of MTVZ.

Friday, October 18, 2019

"Get That Money Based Freestyle"

2019 will be remembered as the only year when rap/country hybrids didn't make eardrums bleed. The trend is destined to become passe very soon.

The latest and possibly final submission to this narrow 5-6 song canon arrived a few weeks ago from none other than Lil B The Based God, deep in his Hunchback of BasedGod mixtape.

And we firmly believe that it's the greatest song in the world right now. No, seriously.

What's The Deal With Curse Word?

The deal with Curse Word is that they're a Boston area band with a new sick album called Your Name. Catch it, people.

Daniel Johnston Will Haunt You This Halloween

We never got to post an official RIP for Daniel whose passing was announced on September 11th.

Satan and ghosts recur throughout his music; we're not 100%, but he may have been a believer in earthly spiritual continuation after death. He seems childlike enough to get a kick out of haunting his fans.

Plan on Daniel Johnston's ghost showing up in your bedroom this October. It'll be great.

10-minute post: Our Affiliates

If you'd like to learn more about TMK, why not check out some of our esteemed affiliate content affiliates?

One thing you might notice about all of these: We are very bad at marketing ourselves, thus the audience numbers are low. But hopes are up, and we got the shit you need.

Affiliate #1: MTVZ

There's no wrong way to fuck with MTVZ. You can watch it on your lappy-top and skip around to the videos with the most enticing titles. (And add all of them to your Youtube favorites.)

You could also try out our preferred experience: Stream it with the streaming stick of your choice, and leave it on while you do chores. Just like MTV in the old days. It even works on Roku!

A new MTVZ will arrive in November. In the meantime here's the August 2019 edition:


Affiliate #2: The MTVZ Store

Is it weird to post this here? We now have a t-shirt store!!

https://www.depop.com/mtvzstore/

Affiliate #3: After Hours Radio

Every night at 10PM after specialty shows, our overnight radio flip takes over the airwaves of WXCI. The Fall semester is in full swing at the moment, so the After Hours block will typically begin closer to midnight until December.

In the meantime, we are doing a terrible job of keeping the official website updated: AfterHoursFM.Com.

There's also an After Hours Mixcloud account for on-demand streaming. Here's one of the captures:


Affiliate #4: Late Night Noise

It's every Monday night, and it's a great time. Check out our weirdo/experimental/outsider/noisy/lofi radio show.

Late Night Noise also has it's own separate Mixcloud account where we also occasionally upload other older radio shows that we hosted between 2002 and the present.
http://latenightnoisefm.blogspot.com/

That's probably everything.

10-minute TMK: Moxley vs Omega Cage Match

Just tryna spruce up the content here with some ten minute posts. Don't mind us.

It's October and it's time to get crazy with some posts that will have a lot more run on sentences than usual.

But first, when you get a minute, check out serious babes Moxley and Omega starring in The Rivalry of the Millennium.

Tuesday, September 17, 2019

THICC AF 2018: The Big List


| Follow "THICC AF 2018" on Spotify |

| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

Down with the thick list. Another big day in the life of the thiccest biggest list. Too bad it's several months too late. We cannot promise it won't happen again.

Spotify is still here, getting shitter year after year. It started out with so much promise, slowly morphing through manifestations of the demon hellride everyone knew it would eventually become. Here is the Spotify playlist with all of the Thiccest AF of 2018.



100. Kali Uchis f/ Tyler the Creator & Bootsy Collins “After the Storm (Pete Rock Remix)” (tie)
100. Kali Uchis "In My Dreams" (tie)
99. Gulch “Burning Desire to Draw Last Breath”
98. Sleep “Leagues Beneath”
97. Cash Rivers and the Sinners “Cheap Truck”
96. Sunwatchers “Loop #2”
95. Ella Mai "Trip"
94. Deerhoof “Live to Tell”
93. Blues Lawyer "Charity Case"
92. Drake “Nice For What”
91. Lil B “Keke That’s My Kitty”
90. Cut Chemist “Moonlightin’ With Biz”
89. Baked “Good For You”
88. Kanye West “Lift Yourself” (tie)
88. Kanye West & Lil Pump f/ Adele Givens “I Love It” (tie)
87. Bruno Mars f/ Cardi B “Finesse (Remix)”
86. Fritz Welch “The Donal Judd vs Elmer Fudd Inner Space Crisis”
85. Kodak Black “I Get Lonely”
84. Roseblood “Black Veil”
83. Hoodboi f/ Tkay Maidza “Glide”
82. Heele “The Paper Sky”
81. Pusha T “If You Know You Know”


80. Nilufer Yanya “Baby Luv” (tie)
80. Phoebe Bridgers “Motion Sickness” (tie)
79. Kash Doll "Here I Go"
78. Robyn “Human Being”
77. Satan’s Satyrs “Ain’t That Lovin’ You Baby”
76. Night Birds “My Dad Is The BTK”
75. Rosalia “Pienso En Tu Mira”
74. Courtney Barnett “Need a Little Time”
73. Terminator 2 “Negative Reinforcement”
72. Mariah Carey “Caution”
71. Natalie Prass “Short Court Style”
70. Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats “I See Through You”
69. Freddie Gibbs f/ 03 Greedo “Death Row”
68. Andrew WK “Music Is Worth Living For”
67. Ovlov “Short Morgan” (tie)
67. Ovlov "Baby Alligator" (tie)
66. Thingy “Not to Follow” (tie)
66. Goblin Cock "Hammond Song" (tie)
65. Connan Mockasin “Charlotte’s Thong”
64. Flasher “Material”
63. Hailu Mergia “Lala Belu”
62. Red Velvet “Bad Boy”
61. Kacey Musgraves “Lonely Weekend”


60. The Shifters “Andrew Bolt”
59. Innumerable Forms "Punishment in Flesh" (tie)
59. Creeping Death "Trail of Confusion" (tie)
58. Nicki Minaj f/ Ariana Grande “Bed” (tie)
58. Ariana Grande “God Is A Woman” (tie)
58. Khalid f/ 6LACK & Ty Dolla $ign "OTW" (tie)
57. Satan’s Satyrs “Take It And Run”
56. Bad Sports “Comes Close”
55. Mason Ramsey “Famous”
54. Three Keep Deep “Kingz Way”
53. Etran de L'Aïr "Etran Hymne"
52. Stove "Mosquiter" (tie)
52. Stove “Nightwalk” (tie)
51. Otoboke Beaver “Anata Watashi Daita Ato Yome No Meshi”
50. David Nance Group “In Her Kingdom” (tie)
50. David Nance “110 Blues (I-80 Version)” (tie)
49. Travis Scott f/ Drake “Sicko Mode”
48. Beach House “Lemon Glow”
47. Windhand "Old Evil" (tie)
47. Windhand “Red Cloud” (tie)
46. Sleep "Sonic Titan"
45. Kim Petras “Heart To Break”
44. Mister Goblin “Option Vampire”
43. Rolling Blackout Coastal Fever "Talking Straight"
42. Surface To Air Missive “Life is So Sad” (tie)
42. Surface To Air Missive "Phases" (tie)
41. 6ix9ine f/ Fetty Wap & A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie “KEKE”


40. D'Angelo “May I? Standing Unshaken”
39. Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats “Bedouin”
38. Kids See Ghosts f/ Louis Prima “4th Dimension”
37. Charly Bliss “Heaven”
36. Dilly Dally “Sober Motel”
35. Doe “My Friends”
34. Jo Passed “MDM”
33. Swearin’ “Future Hell”
32. Stove “Safe Guy”
31. Unknown Mortal Orchestra “American Guilt”
30. Negative Scanner “Shoplifter”
29. Bali Baby “Backseat”
28. No Age “Popper”
27. Ovlov “Grab It From The Garden”
26. Rae Sremmurd f/ Pharrell “Chanel”
25. Robyn “Ever Again”
24. Windhand “Diablerie”
23. Stefflon Don “Lil Bitch (Intro)”
22. Beak> “King of the Castle” (tie)
22. Beak> “Harvester” (tie)
21. Sleep “Marijuanaut’s Theme”


20. Soccer Mommy “Your Dog”
19. Kim Petras “I Don’t Want It At All”
18. Flasher “Who’s Got Time?”
17. Surface to Air Missive “Landing Safely”
16. The Chats “Smoko”
15. Lizzo “Boys”
14. Candy “Distorted Dreams”
13. No Age “Tidal” (tie)
13. No Age "Send Me" (tie)
12. Mindforce “Excalibur”
11. Sheck Wes “Mo Bamba”
10. Ariana Grande “No Tears Left To Cry”
09. Adrianne Lenker “Symbol”
08. Jocko "Muddy Waters"
07. Kacey Musgraves “High Horse”
06. Beak> “Brean Down”
05. Ella Mai “Boo’d Up”
04. Three Knee Deep “Hackin’ Of Da Mindz”
03. Ariana Grande “Thank U, Next”
02. Valee f/ Jeremih “Womp Womp”
01. Windhand “Grey Garden”


| Follow "THICC AF 2018" on Spotify |

| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

Sunday, September 15, 2019

THICC AF 2018: #100 - 81


| Follow "THICC AF 2018" on Spotify |

| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

This is by far the longest it's taken us to finish one of these, and it's technically incomplete in case no one has noticed yet. Most of the entries have no description. The photo editing is now at peak stream-of-consciousness, perhaps reflecting the chaotic, nonsensical, anarchic, apathetic, nihilistic nature of human existence throughout 2018-2019.

#1 2018 was a much better year for albums than singles/tracks/non-album-trx/etc, and the decline has left us disheartened, discouraged, and unmotivated to praise a year of songs that simply weren't as good. We really tried our best to make this feel like a solid representation.

#2 We have already written about many of the artists in this Thicc Mix, especially ones whose tracks represent album highlights. For example, No Age or Uncle Acid or Beak's consistently dope string of releases feels like a no brainer for a list like this -- but we're not good enough at writing to think of anything different to say than what we said last time.

#3 Not as much time as we used to have. Maybe BDE Mix 2019 will all happen throughout January 2020 though. Let's hope so.

So now finally the whole thing is here. The lower quantity of dopeness reflects the drop from a 200 song list down to 100, chosen from a much smaller than usual pool of eligible jams. (On the bright side, it became easier for legit dope jams to shine and place higher than they would have 3-4 years ago.)

Now who's ready to party down???

100. Kali Uchis f/ Tyler the Creator & Bootsy Collins “After the Storm (Pete Rock Remix)” / Kali Uchis "In My Dreams"


99. Gulch “Burning Desire to Draw Last Breath”


98. Sleep “Leagues Beneath”



97. Cash Rivers and the Sinners “Cheap Truck”
Should we just upload this one ourselves? Robert Pollard's weirdo country band released a 69 song album last October, as if there weren't enough 69 song albums in the world. But just to make it all the more frustrating, it's not streaming anywhere. The chorus goes like this "Would you like to take a ride with me in my cheap truck?" The world of streaming media could use some of this.
https://www.guidedbyvoices.com/more-news/2018/9/12/cash-rivers-and-the-sinners-do-not-try-to-adjust-your-set-i-am-the-horizontal-and-the-vertical

96. Sunwatchers “Loop #2”
Typically described with tags like avant-jazz, free-rock, psychedelic, and the like, Sunwatchers chose to close out their 2018 odds-and-sods collection with the year's most enticingly strange meditation. It's incredible that this song exists, but how did this happen and why is jam-rock heading in this direction? Our theory all but rules out the possibility that one band members' 7-inch copy of "Too Drunk To Fuck" became scratched to the point where a skip in the vinyl aligned just perfectly enough that Jello Biafra's lyrics change to "I got diarrhea today-hay." With the groove locked in, Sunwatchers' ambiance hovers over the loop as it repeats over 100 times. Thanks to word-association, we can't help but think of frequent diarrhea victim Wesley Willis who released multiple LPs on Jello's record label Alternative Tenticles between the late '90s and early '00s.


95. Ella Mai "Trip"
What would have been one of the decade's most beloved one-hit-wonders became a two-hit-wonder by December as "Trip" hit #1 on Billboard's Rhythmic chart and secured a nice little area in the lower 20 of Billboard's end-of-year Hot 100 (where the generally strongest charting songs of the past few years have hid). Can she turn her streak into a two-album stride? We'll likely find out by the end of 2019. In the meantime, it sounds like "Trip" still gets mad radio spins. So iHeart did at least one thing correctly in the past year. For more info, Ella Mai did one of those Genius annotation videos that we weirdly don't hate yet.


94. Deerhoof “Live to Tell”



93. Blues Lawyer "Charity Case"
Unjustly missing out on the Grammy for "Best New Band Name."


92. Drake “Nice For What”

Drake: "What's a dick for? Oh, wait. I get it."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9BwWKXjVaI

91. Lil B “Keke That’s My Kitty”



90. Cut Chemist “Moonlightin’ With Biz”


89. Baked “Good For You”
We tried to find a gif of Gilbert Gottfried and Beetlejuice yelling "Goo for you" at each other to no avail.


88. Kanye West “Lift Yourself” / Kanye West & Lil Pump f/ Adele Givens “I Love It”
The imaginary 2018 Kanye album that included these and 10-12 other similarly bizarre, unfinished experiments (that likely exist on an external hardrive somewhere) might have been a more appropriate follow-up to the lone artifact from his "disjointedness is cohesion" era -- the sprawling, possibly unfinished, and predictably underappreciated The Life of Pablo. Rap's answer to Third/Sister Lovers right down to the uncertainty in its last minute title changes, Pablo is now probably his most unheralded since 808s following a pattern of musical influence more clearly defined in hindsight; 808s was ultimately proven as the single most influential record of the past decade.

More recently, his attempts to subvert modern album-length restrictions feel ripe for the streaming era. With release dates and frequent media assets as overemphasized as ever, releasing 2016's scrapped Turbo Graffx 16 as a rushed double-LP would have only wasted resources. Why not spread out the public's attention with five release dates instead of one? Make them all EP-length, 20 minutes each, but call them full-length albums anyway. The brevity encourages not only listener engagement but repeated plays. Even better, labeling them full-length dissuades Billboard charts, music writers, and fans from brushing them aside as anything less than a complete artistic statement. And then just for fun, why not bookend these five releases with two extraordinarily bizarre teaser singles that all but reflect any lack of silliness these records might hold? Very few other artists have tried this "extended release period" tactic just yet, but the idea is out there, and there's no reason not to. P.S. Sorry to disappoint, but facts are facts: "Lift Yourself" had 2018's most memorable verse (accurately described in the song itself as "these bars"); meanwhile, the kids on the playground who knew anything about "Story of Adidon" forgot about its existence within weeks.
Lift Yourself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fbyfDbi-MI
I Love It: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwQgjq0mCdE

87. Bruno Mars f/ Cardi B “Finesse (Remix)”
This one actually pisses us off because it proves that Bruno Mars LLC (and his team of thousands) could single-handedly assist the long-awaited comeback of "fun music getting played on FM radio" with just a few easy phonecalls. As for Cardi B, we don't really get the hype surrounding LP1. But we like her, and we suspect her next record might be cool if she doesn't go all fairweather on us like Katy Perry --- which likely wouldn't even be her fault if it did work out that way. Welcome to the machine, Cardi B. This is your life now. Hell awaits you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LsoLEjrDogU

86. Fritz Welch “The Donal Judd vs Elmer Fudd Inner Space Crisis”



85. Kodak Black “I Get Lonely”

We incorrectly lost hope long ago for emo-trap's eventual dabble in accidental left-of-spectrum outsider-ness. Kodak Black proves us wrong again; like one lost little star, his radiance shines closer to Lil B than Lil Peep. 100% worth the hype.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7bo6batUH4

84. Roseblood “Black Veil”
Still no word on when this full length is due, but the handful of preview songs in their live sets kick serious ass. Get ready.


83. Hoodboi f/ Tkay Maidza “Glide”

2018's best song about bagel bites. Welcome back Tkay. This is probably her 2nd best song after "U-Huh."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJG6DFdkqSQ

82. Heele “The Paper Sky”
Godzilla continues his brooding lonely journey. He applied to 5 or 6 veterinarian schools, but still no acceptance letters. He's been swiping left and right for months, but still no matches. Godzilla stays out of everyone's sight because they assume he wants to attack, even though he just wants what we all want.


81. Pusha T “If You Know You Know”
Unpopular take: We were kinda unimpressed with Daytona?? And it's not like Kanye's production doesn't always work with Pusha. Afterall, that was the exact team who killed it with "Numbers On The Boards" five years prior. But something feels different here. Maxi-singles used to occasionally run as long as seven songs, and Daytona starts to feel that way by the end. The rigid deliberate blueprint of "If You Know You Know" might be Kanye's only 2018 music resembling The Blueprint. But then it's follow by six uncooked ideas that might have sounded amazing without the record's loose, wobbly architecture.

And how about that horrific album art?? Did all parties involved seriously think people would just be like "oh cool, that's a great idea for an album cover?" Its embarrassing context should never have been promoted as a selling point. Next time, try keeping it a secret for as long as possible.


| Follow "THICC AF 2018" on Spotify |

| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

THICC AF 2018: #80 - 61


| Follow "THICC AF 2018" on Spotify |

| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

80. Nilufer Yanya “Baby Luv” / Phoebe Bridgers “Motion Sickness”



79. Kash Doll "Here I Go"

This is here because of TikTok. Duh.


78. Robyn “Human Being”


77. Satan’s Satyrs “Ain’t That Lovin’ You Baby”
If only it were 1991 again -- back when it was common for The Black Crowes' cover of Otis Redding's "Hard To Handle" and Ugly Kid Joe's "I Hate Everything About You" commonly bumped on MTV and Z100 transitioning in and out of jams from the likes of Janet Jackson and MC Hammer. (We're assuming Top 40 stations used to play "Once Bitten Twice Shy" in the late '80s, but that was before our time.) This long forgotten sub-subgenre is what Satan's Satyrs has sonically achieved with their update on a '50s R&B standard. Needless to say, we're all for it. It's hilarious and a lot more fun than it has any right to be. And it should never have disappeared in the first place. Why was there only one of these in 2018? We need more.


76. Night Birds “My Dad Is The BTK”
Yeah sure, and my landlord is John Wayne Gacy.


75. Rosalia “Pienso En Tu Mira”


74. Courtney Barnett “Need a Little Time”
"I'm Obama and I say we turn this shit the fuck up." - Barack Obama, closing his eyes, nodding on the downbeats


73. Terminator 2 “Negative Reinforcement”

Terminator 2 is back??? We wish. The Dallas two-piece recorded this enormously brutal jam in 2014-2015, keeping it unreleased until mid-2018. It's huge though.


72. Mariah Carey “Caution”


71. Natalie Prass “Short Court Style”


70. Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats “I See Through You”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfKBfq75_7E

69. Freddie Gibbs f/ 03 Greedo “Death Row”


68. Andrew WK “Music Is Worth Living For”


67. Ovlov “Short Morgan” / Ovlov "Baby Alligator"


66. Thingy “Not to Follow” / Goblin Cock "Hammond Song"
Mad respect to Rob Crow for even considering the immense creative challenge tackled through his 2018 Joyful Noise residency. But also respect is due for welcoming the breakneck release schedule as an opportunity to revisit Optiganally Yours and Thingy, two bands who hadn't released any new music since 2000. As far as we can tell, neither of these bands had ever split up, but the enormous success of Pinback (originally intended a a side project) resulted in the unexpected stretch between releases. We have not yet heard the entire box, but a random sampling indicates a lack of throwaways, performed entirely to precision, meticulously recorded and mixed, carefully sequenced -- especially Anal Trump's outstanding The First 100 Songs LP.

Goblin Cock's curious all-covers entry marks a sonic departure from the group's previous releases. A loud, demonic, and refreshingly cloaked version of The Monkees' "Porpoise Song" obscures its psychedelic affiliation. Our personal highlight goes to an exciting thrash take of The Roches' "Hammond Song." We're not sure why we chose "Not To Follow" as the Thingy stand-out, but it's definitely a strong one-song representation of their record as a whole.
"Not To Follow" : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBtxTVXeQog&t=497s
"Hammond Song" : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tM65kpHzz0

65. Connan Mockasin “Charlotte’s Thong”


64. Flasher “Material”


63. Hailu Mergia “Lala Belu”


62. Red Velvet “Bad Boy”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J_CFBjAyPWE

61. Kacey Musgraves “Lonely Weekend”
"Slow Burn" is fine, but we don't really get why it turned into the critical favorite of this record. Same goes for "Rainbow" -- a very strange choice for the post-Grammy-hype radio single. "Butterflies" and "Space Cowboy" were also fine choices for album previews. But all of the above don't feel hooky enough to stand-out within pop-country radio. (Modern country fans still listen to old-fashioned regular-ass radio, by the way.) "Lonely Weekend" and "High Horse" are clearly the two songs that are easiest to remember after one listen. They are the obvious pop hits, and should have been treated as such. Another enormous blunder in the world of modern radio programming, further proof that "the biz" collectively has no idea what the fuck they are doing.


| Follow "THICC AF 2018" on Spotify |

| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

Thursday, September 12, 2019

THICC AF 2018: #60 - 41


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| 100 - 81 || 80 - 61 || 60 - 41 || 40 - 21 || 20 - 1 |

| All 100 Songs |

60. The Shifters “Andrew Bolt”


59. Innumerable Forms "Punishment in Flesh" / Creeping Death "Trail of Confusion"




58. Nicki Minaj f/ Ariana Grande “Bed” / Ariana Grande “God Is A Woman” / Khalid f/ 6LACK & Ty Dolla $ign "OTW"





57. Satan’s Satyrs “Take It And Run”
At the final table of the 2018 World Series of Poker’s $1,500 seven-card stud event in June, Albini wasn’t wearing shades or showing off any tacky ink. But he did have on a black T-shirt featuring the name and logo of a Belgian punk band called Cocaine Piss. Albini works with the group. “We actually have a session booked in a couple weeks,” said Albini, the owner of Electrical Audio in Chicago. “They’re coming to record another album.” After he sported the tee, traffic to the Cocaine Piss Bandcamp page quickly jumped. https://www.theringer.com/sports/2018/7/2/17524632/steve-albini-poker-world-series-champion


56. Bad Sports “Comes Close”



55. Mason Ramsey “Famous”
Mason Ramsey went to Walmart sometime prior to March 24th, 2018, and he decided to yodel. Someone took a video with their phone -- likely one of his parents. And they wisely tagged the video "Walmart Yodel Boy" to make it seem like the video was not taken by anyone in the yodeller's family. By March 31st, the uploaded video had an entry on knowyourmeme. By April 13th, Mason had been asked to perform at Coachella. Up until this point, the meme felt pretty annoying. However, it all became justified mere weeks later after a songwriting team of four people wrote him the outstandingly dope song "Famous." It was quickly recorded and released to Spotify on April 27th, later debuting at #62 on the Billboard Hot 100. It's not tough to quickly move on from an unremarkable meme-of-the-week, but a dope jam lasts forever. Also he kinda looks like Jordy.


54. Three Keep Deep “Kingz Way”


53. Etran de L'Aïr "Etran Hymne"
The No. 1 LP is the winner of what would have been the Grammy for "Wedding Band Album Of The Year" if such a Grammy Award ever existed. A layer of field recording surrounds the atmosphere of this mysterious 2014 artifact, possibly taped with only one or two mics. Liner notes reveal that these distant captured sounds are an actual wedding, and that Etran de L'Air is one of Niger's most successful wedding bands. We would like them to play at every wedding forever, but that is impossible. So instead, just play the CD or vinyl. It'll be great. P.S. Why don't more wedding people get vinyl DJ's to spin at their weddings? Kinda sick of just seeing the one dumbass with the mic spinning the same dumbass songs for 5 hours.


52. Stove "Mosquiter" / Stove “Nightwalk”



51. Otoboke Beaver “Anata Watashi Daita Ato Yome No Meshi”


50. David Nance Group “In Her Kingdom” / David Nance “110 Blues (I-80 Version)”



49. Travis Scott f/ Drake “Sicko Mode”



48. Beach House “Lemon Glow”


47. Windhand "Old Evil" / Windhand “Red Cloud”



46. Sleep "Sonic Titan"
For all practical intents and purposes, the fluid track listing of Dopesmoker finally congealed upon the release of its 2012 vinyl and streaming reissue: Track 1: "Dopesmoker (Parts 1, 2 and 3)" Track 2: "Holy Mountain (live in 1994)," Track 3: "Sonic Titan (live in 1992)." After lasting 20 years without any official studio release, "Sonic Titan" seemed destined to go down as a lost fan favorite. Without much warning, 4/20/2018 suddenly arrived with a Beyonce-style surprise drop from perhaps the most mythic stoner-metal band of all time. The Sciences had arrived.

The record's two lengthiest jams - "Antarcticans Thawed" and "Sonic Titan" - both survived similarly long journeys from their 1992 genesis, written alongside "Dopesmoker" starting around the close of the Sleep's Holy Mountain sessions. Fully ripened in its official studio version, "Sonic Titan" now stretches well-past the 12-minute mark, fully formed beyond its 9-minute Dopesmoker version. The placement of the bass solo after its gigantic intro justifies every repetition. The Iommi-thirds accompanying its riff ascend straight into one of Matt Pike's wildest shredder solos.

[Incorrectly labelled as "Giza Butler" on Bandcamp.]

45. Kim Petras “Heart To Break”


44. Mister Goblin “Option Vampire”


43. Rolling Blackout Coastal Fever "Talking Straight"


42. Surface To Air Missive “Life is So Sad” / Surface To Air Missive "Phases"


41. 6ix9ine f/ Fetty Wap & A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie “KEKE”
We were bad.


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| All 100 Songs |

Sunday, September 8, 2019

THICC AF 2018: #40 - 21



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40. D'Angelo “May I? Standing Unshaken”
D'Angelo loves Red Dead Redemption 2 so much that he refused to leave RockStar's offices until 5AM each night, playing the game until very late for weeks straight. Eventually the game creators were just like, "you know, if you love the game so much, why don't you go get married to it, or go write a song for it or something." Figuring D'Angelo would be like "lol, good one," he instead responds "well, that's quite a fine idea you got there, and I think I might do just that!" And the game creators said back, "Which one, get married to the game or write a song for it?" And then D'Angelo responds, "Both ideas are quite sharp. I'll get back to you on that." This is all verbatim and true, by the way. There is a 2019 version of this song floating around on streaming services that is not the original version posted to Youtube back in November 2018. The song feels a lot less complete without the long intro, similar to what usually would happen when radio stations would butcher the intro of "Really Love" (on the few R&B stations that bothered to play it early in 2015). Speaking of that, we have not forgotten D'Angelo saying Black Messiah was intended as a double-album, and that there's another LP of unreleased jams ready to drop at any given moment. Perhaps more videogame creators should give D'Angelo free shit in exchange for new songs since this is now officially the only thing left that motivates him. S.O.S. Plz halp. We need you D.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RajRfIG0mwo

39. Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats “Bedouin”

Unkie Sid dishes out another dope TRACK 7 for your spaced out enjoyment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7T8jI9Uxlts

38. Kids See Ghosts f/ Louis Prima “4th Dimension”
Most artists stick to the same lane when considering guest attributions, although Kanye is not most artists. His name appears alone throughout his very collaborative Yeezus LP. A few years earlier, MBDTF's metadata wisely omitted the exhaustive list of guests on "All Of The Lights."

Despite Kanye's further notoriety for lifting samples without clearing licensing rights, the metadata applied to Billboard's chart stats list "4th Dimension" with an unusual guest-spot from Louis Prima. His Christmas song from 1936 supplies the song's haunting, jazzy foundation, and Kanye's guest-tag secured Louis Prima's current world record for the longest stretch of weeks between chart placements on the Hot 100.

"4th Dimension" also marks the return of Kanye's trademark "Jesus Walks" drums, long absent from his music since around the time of Man on the Moon: The End of Day. Without any other proof, we suspect "4th Dimension" experienced its creative genesis around the same era, possibly intended (alongside 2010's "Christmas In Harlem") as part of an abandoned Kanye holiday LP.


37. Charly Bliss “Heaven”
36. Dilly Dally “Sober Motel”
35. Doe “My Friends”
34. Jo Passed “MDM”
33. Swearin’ “Future Hell”

Whoever they get to curate Side A of the Angus 2 soundtrack now owes us several thousand dollars. We accept Western Union or Traveler's Checks ONLY. Four of these were released within a 3 week span at the start of the 2018-2019 academic school year. The kids really want this; they just don't know it yet.






32. Stove “Safe Guy”

NSFW


31. Unknown Mortal Orchestra “American Guilt”



30. Negative Scanner “Shoplifter”



29. Bali Baby “Backseat”
Q: Should "Baby Shark" be in this list?
A: Yeah probably.


28. No Age “Popper”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUy3oVM1Fzw

27. Ovlov “Grab It From The Garden”
Joining "The Great Alligator" and "Dumboy" in the Stovlov epics canon.


26. Rae Sremmurd f/ Pharrell “Chanel”


25. Robyn “Ever Again”


24. Windhand “Diablerie”


23. Stefflon Don “Lil Bitch (Intro)”


22. Beak> “King of the Castle” / Beak> “Harvester”




21. Sleep “Marijuanaut’s Theme”



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Wednesday, September 4, 2019

THICC AF 2018: #20 - 1


Here are placements and vaguely related analysis. This started in January and is still unfinished bc we couldn't think of anything good. Please only read the placements. In protest against the blogs who only know how to analyze lyrics, we are including brief occasional analyses of snare drum tone and trending status, usually dependent on how often the song appears on TikTok. The trending jams of the moment are the new summer jams. Top 40 is dead, and iHeart killed it by constructing their playlists based strictly around fixed survey data and against the nature of broadly human trends. No one pays attention to the blurbys so just read the placements and move on with your day.

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20. Soccer Mommy “Your Dog”



19. Kim Petras “I Don’t Want It At All”
Despite its designation as a frustratingly unexciting era for music and pop culture, August 2008 retroactively revealed some buried hints suggesting a desire to move young people away from the mid-2000s' sickening obsession with extravagant materialism. It's the month Kim Petras turned 16. It's also when MTV aired its last four episodes of My Super Sweet 16 in a block that included birthday celebrations for teen millionaires like Bow Wow and Sean Kingston. The stock market crashed just a few short weeks later. "I Kissed A Girl" was the biggest hit of the moment and marked a then-pinnacle of chart success for Dr. Luke, the song's ultimately despised writer and producer. We were reluctant to include "I Don't Want It At All" in our list due to Luke's involvement, but plainly stated: We really care about Kim Petras. We want Kim to blow up. She got what she needed out of that era and realizes she's ready to move onto bigger and better things. Looking back, the song structure itself is fascinatingly flawed, exposing elements that went into the process hit-creators relied upon throughout the "party like a rockstar" era. Everything about this is tongue-in-cheek. Fuck capitalism.


18. Flasher “Who’s Got Time?”
I'm afraid that's just not going to be good enough, because...because of the urgency of the matter, you understand...do you have Gilberto Bababucci?


17. Surface to Air Missive “Landing Safely”
After an abbreviated version of "Landing Safely" appeared on the Post-Trash Vol.3 comp in January 2018, we initially wondered if Surface had reverted to the sound of their earlier records. We received our answer the following November with the release of Surface II Air Missive, their "lost" second LP, intended for release at some point between 2013's self-titled and 2015's Third Missive (helping to explain why their 2nd album had the word "third" in its title). While its delayed release was never intentional, anyone craving the Elephant-6-goes-hard baroque/prog aesthetic explored on Third Missive received one last helping before S.A.M. moves onto their next venture.


16. The Chats “Smoko”
As Iggy Pop and Josh Homme pump "Smoko" on the reg, its "huge hit" status also earned The Chats a daunting grind: Their giant world tour now extends through the end of November, selling out medium-sized US venues in NYC and elsewhere. Seeming barely 21 in their no-budget viral videos, we would wager they'll never become self-aware before splitting up. They have another 2-3 years of youthful dgaf stored up, alleviating concerns for any future blandness traps. (Have they released any full length LPs yet? Will they ever?) We'd expect nothing less from a Bandcamp handle like thechatslovebeer.bandcamp.com. If MTV still showed Buzz Clips, we suspect a 3-second snippet of "Smoko" would've prominently kicked off multiple 30-second bumpers throughout Fall '18 and Winter '19. Does Charles Aaron like "Smoko?" Trending status = Way higher than a lot of people thought.


15. Lizzo “Boys”
Lizzo's busy thinkin' 'bout boys boys boys. So many kinds. Where do we start? We like them dumb and we like them smart. We like the ones with the pretty eyes. Well we like all kinds of guys. Two of those boys just might be Pharrell and Prince, who once upon a time slid suspiciously similar grooves under Kelis and Vanity 6 respectively. Wikipedia reveals Wallpaper handled production; 2012 was the last time we wrote about Wallpaper, when he appeared somewhere around #6 on our worst songs of 2012, mostly thanks to its lyrics. In "Boys," Lizzo's energy and charisma wipe away the vomit-flavored chuckle gummy and mixes in a tightly secret recipe for batches and cookies. TikTok trending status = Currently very strong.


14. Candy “Distorted Dreams”



13. No Age “Tidal” / No Age "Send Me"
Many of our favorite bands put out their 2nd best albums in 2018, and we're pretty sure all of these were the best since the breakthroughs that won us over in the first place. We knew No Age had to release at least one more classic record before the end of the decade, and Snares Like a Haircut delivered on our hopes. "Send Me" exemplifies a send-off for the decade, capping an era of indie-punk that feels ready to move forward.

Snare drum tone = Close mic, tightly recorded. Trending status = They're trending in our hearts. Band Of The Decade. Always different, but always the same. Lookit em go.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PhCW4jaNZY

12. Mindforce “Excalibur”
Our notes say "[Something] of hooks." Apply that to "Excalibur" because it has like 7 huge hooks.


11. Sheck Wes “Mo Bamba”
Everything we wanted to say about this song is probably somewhere in our review of the video from back in January. TikTok trending status = Strong.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWoIpDVkOH0

10. Ariana Grande “No Tears Left To Cry”
Driving around in the summertime. Something about the greatest crossover event in history:

#hope
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffxKSjUwKdU

09. Adrianne Lenker “Symbol”
She's in our top 10 every year now, and it's looking like this is about to happen again in 2019.
Snare drum tone = n/a.


08. Jocko "Muddy Waters"
One early take from "Muddy Waters" derived from its mysteriously unattributed 2nd vocalist. Why is the promo video's guest singer different from the live videos? Was she unable to get time-off for tour? After some digging and discussion, we learned that the band might locate one or two volunteer on-stage participants to fill-in this crucial guest verse and chorus, originally sung by someone who is not a full time band member. Jocko has toured on-and-off since this album's digital release (about a year ago), and we are jealous of anyone who gets to see them. Physical release came out in 2019, so we will likely use this as loophole for "Albums of the year" come January. The music video prominently features hockey and hackeysack, and (again) we will figure out a way to include it in "Best Videos of 2019" even though it came out in December 2017 because we no longer care about accurate chronology.


07. Kacey Musgraves “High Horse”
The greatest disco-country song of the decade from an album that literally won the Grammy for "Album Of The Year" has yet to receive any spins from iHeart's CHR format. Pop is burning down from the inside out and no one with any substantial power to generate a shift is doing anything to stop it. "High Horse" never charted, and it's capitalism's fault. Pop exposure and promotion has never experienced a more devistatingly flawed era, and it will be a VERY long time before we recover. "Things are different now" is not a good enough reason to repeatedly point the finger at those who don't give a fuck about Imagine Dragons. "If you don't like it, then you're too old." Sorry, but that's not how it works.

As for the drug metaphor, it's as clear as day: "Horse" is also known as "Riding the H-Train." You know that expression "there's enough here to kill a horse?" "You ain't never gonna come down." Keep chasing that dragon. You'll see what happens.


06. Beak> “Brean Down”

Everything is speeding up out of nowhere and we don't know how to handle it. "They don't like our music cuz it ain't up on the radio." The sound of time speeding up out of nowhere. Gets worse the longer you wait.


05. Ella Mai “Boo’d Up”
So are we Brean Down or Boo'd Up? Decisions, decisions. If you're Boo'd Up, there are two versions to consider:
-- Version 1.0: The single and EP edit crudely stop as if someone pulled the plug following a brief spoken soliloquy.
-- Version 2.0: Released a few months later, the album edit continues into the next song without fading, but also without Ella Mai's skit. Some might prefer hearing "Boo'd Up" segue smoothly into "Breakfast In Bed," but the vibe somehow switches even more abruptly.
Demoitis strikes again? Its unresolved abruptly cut outro strengthens the song as a whole, creating a rare instance of a "definitive version" that caught us by surprise.


04. Three Knee Deep “Hackin’ Of Da Mindz”
We remember a few dumbasses on Twitter circa November 2016 trying their best to find a silver lining by predicting a 4-year punk rock renaissance. We're not sure if this is what those people meant, but our lives have not been quite the same since crossing paths with the year's most ignorant jam. "Hackin' Of Da Mindz" was our introduction to Boston's Triple B Records, the most impressively dope hardcore label of the moment, boasting an outstanding roster including the latest from Candy and Mindforce, plus Three Knee Deep's outstanding Wrong World EP. We'd say "PMA is back" but that seems inappropriate here.

Snare drum tone = Tight with lots of reverb. As huge as it ever got for '90s NYC hardcore, ie Madball, Biohazard, Cro-Mags. // Trending status = Cult.


03. Ariana Grande “Thank U, Next”
In these sad times, bad music bloggers tend to avoid actual descriptions of sound in favor of lyrical analysis and irrelevant narratives. With under 48 hours to process "Thank U, Next," initial takes barely scratched the surface, unsurprisingly incapable of divorcing the song from Ariana's public life, thereby perpetuating even more poptimist celebrations of the ephemeral.

The break-up anthem of 2018 deserved and justly received so much better, dominating Top 40, parties, car stereos, and BBQs for over six months. It will likely place Top 5 in Billboard's "Hot 100 of 2019." Unlike its fellow break-up classic, 2002's "Cry Me A River," its design emphasizes human experience over narcissism. "Thank U, Next" actively intervenes by murdering her rumor mill instead of strategically nurturing. It flips Britney's ambiguous shrugs and Taylor's subtle lyrical hints on their respective heads. "Here's my response track. Here's who I'm singing about. Here's how I feel about it. The message emphasizes the inherent empowerment one receives after moving the fuck on with our lives. I suggest you all do the same." Granted, Ariana Grande may not have completely altered the variable, but she's clearly just as bored with the manipulative pop/tabloid connection as many of her fans, especially those who get that there are far more important things happening in the world right now.

Snare tone = Ballad-mute during verses and outro, celebratory and punchy during chorus. // Anthem status = all-time classic. // Trending status = peaked throughout Spring 2019.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OeR5XBEahU

02. Valee f/ Jeremih “Womp Womp”
Now that TikTok is the only true remaining hit-maker of the moment, "Womp Womp," also known as "Wamp Wamp" and "Sad Trombone," could live beyond its onomatopoeic definition, typically mimicked from a human mouth to indicate failures ranging from small to not-so-small. The Price Is Right might be the home of the all time classic Womp Womp, best exemplified by instances when both contestants overbid during the final showcase showdown, indicating an enormous trombone-flavored fail. In "Womp Womp," Valee sings about watching one such episode of The Price Is Right at home during a snow day. Radio should stop avoiding the true hits. Millions of kids sang this extremely fun song that still isn't getting any radio airplay. What does this tell us? Oh wait, we know. It means that iHeartRadio is racist.

Snare drum tone = Clapping along at the club. // TikTok trending status = Currently very strong.


01. Windhand “Grey Garden”
On a personal note, this is the first time in over half-a-decade that our #1 comes from any act marginally resembling a rock band. The last time this happened was our embarrassing 2012 blunder awarding the honor to Japandroids' "The Nights Of Wine and Roses" (beating many of our future 500 Hottest Jams like the far more deserving "Adorn" or "Come On A Cone"). Rock continued to place more sparingly in Hot Mixes between 2013-2016 because non-rock genres were winning. The Trump-era shift might be coincidental, but we're happy to announce that loud rock, metal, and alternative (and pop) gloriously won all the big awards of 2018. By the fall, the time felt right for a band like Windhand to drop the year's hottest jam.

Their wizardry is no joke, perfectly blending spacey sci-fi with renaissance through precise alchemy: Three-parts sludge and doom, two-parts soaring melodic overtones, crushingly huge hooks. On their own, the elements cross paths with Alice In Chains, Deftones, and Sub Pop's Deep Six comp (partially guided with Jack Endino's hand in production). But the key ingredient might be pure, meditative, hypnotic simplicity -- broadening Windhand's hypothetical venn diagram just enough to align with former tour-mates Sleep.

Apparently, we weren't the only ones who sought references to either the film Grey Gardens or Bill Hader's equally bizarre parody on Documentary Now. The most obvious crossover we can find is the grunginess itself: Decaying, musty, germy, decades-old dust. "I used to recognize this place" ... "Isn't it all a mess?"


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