Thursday, December 31, 2020

"Video Kiddos 2020" Starts Now

Like we said earlier, the resources for hot videos were not as on point throughout 2020 as in previous years. We will need to locate some new ones for 2021.

Despite the dreadful circumstances of the world at large, we know amazing art still gets created everyday. People are still making both great music and great music videos. The problem was not creativity, but rather the worlds of promotion and distribution, both shriveling at an alarming rate.

While we know video quality is not necesarily a reflection on the state of rock music, great rock videos just didn't want us to find them throughout 2020. Again, hiphop seemed to rule the world of music videos, although only a handful felt worthy of any sort of modern canon for the new decade.

We recognize that this was not the easiest year for distributing art or music, nor was it an era that made it easy to collaborate on promotion. It was also a year packed from end to end with far more important world events that may have pulled many artists away from their craft. But still, we held onto some hope that a few of our favorite bands might find ways to get creative and utilize the world of streaming video resources.

We caught a handful of streaming concerts-from-home throughout 2020, and we're happy to report that a few of these got surprisingly weird and interesting. But we're also not sure if those count as music videos. Perhaps they should count, but some of them were only shown once and were never saved or made available for streaming, suggesting that these were intended as true concert-from-home experiences.

So we're left with the official and unofficial promo clips. We wrote down a few that we remembered from the past year that had some striking images. They're not all great, but we needed some bonus clips to write about before getting into the Top 10. So here they are:

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Mariah Carey "Underneath The Stars"

Go figure that we're kicking this off with a Mariah Carey video from 1996.

Watching this now, "Underneath The Stars" could feasibly timestamp the swan song of Mariah's "wholesome" era. The video originally intended to close Daydream's album cycle circa Spring '96 but was delayed due to the enormous success of "Always Be My Baby." We're guessing Tommy Motolla (or someone) eventually decided to shelve the video and prioritize the sessions for Butterfly -- the record which ultimately marked the arrival moment of her horny-makeover rebrand and eventual divorce from Motolla, complete with a "balls deep in Derek Jeter" announcement.

Flash forward to 2012: Mariah declared "Underneath The Stars" her lost video. A few years later, it was restored and then finally released to Vevo in November 2020. At least one blog placed it as their #1 video of the year, which only really makes sense when accounting for its mythic trajectory. The video would have been deemed as somewhat unremarkable and a huge marketing misstep had it been released 24 years ago as planned. But in the context of 2020, its miraculous exhumation feels sent from God himself.

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MonoNeon & Madlib "Fallin' (Instrumental)"

It actually scares us that we were somewhat attracted to THIS specific color palate throughout 2020. The classic couch quilt makes an appearance here. It's weird how so many of this year's videos reflect the exact circumstances of our own lives.

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2 Chainz f/ Ty Dolla Sign & Lil Duval "Can't Go For That"

It took a few years, but 2 Chainz has officially evolved into one of the most tasteful video artists of hiphop's modern era, alongside DaBaby and Young Thug. "Can't Go For That" has a great set up, but then we expected some extra narrative to resolve the conflict. But either way, the aesthetic won us over. And bonus props to the masked drummer.

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Protomartyr "Processed By The Boys"

MTVZ played this one a lot in 2020, and we're still kind of unsure what they're going for. Definitely weird, surreal, and kind of confusing, it reflects a universe where low budget TV shows somehow get approved for on-air programming despite lacking any point or purpose. We're not sure if the cable access of the '90s nor the low budget public television of the '80s ever showed eventless purposeless people on TV just for the sake of filling time on the schedule. Even the worst of these shows typically include something resembling a message or theme. Like, we cannot at all imagine what the dialog on this hypothetical TV show could potentially resemble. But maybe that is the point? In either case, "Processed By The Boys" somewhat aesthetically reminded us of that one Chavez video, enough that we added it to our list of videos that we think Beavis and Butthead should watch when the show gets rebooted, which we know won't make any difference, but we can always hope.

Hope: The only real drug we have left.

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The Strokes "Bad Decisions"

Not really sure why this is partially shown in 4:3 or why the filters seem intended to evoke suburban '70s aesthetic since The Strokes are all '80s babies who did not exist in the '70s (except for possibly Cassablancas, the eldest of The Strokes).

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Lil Yachty, Drake, and DaBaby f/ Drake "Oprah's Bank Account"

The still images captured our attention, and we're fans of all three contributing artists. Oprah is played by Lil Yachty who interviews two rappers on her hit talk show. Not a bad idea. Decent concept. What could go wrong?

#1 Perhaps this video was doomed from the start since the song lacks a hook or any production elements that some might consider fun-sounding.

#2 We're pretty sure this video is shooting for "funny." So then, why were the extras in the audience cast as millennial cusp babes? Wouldn't it have been 1000x more interesting if they got the same Karen boomers who would typically fill up the audience on Oprah?

#3 We're unsure why this needed to be 9 minutes long, or why its final 20 seconds feature not only an immense credit scroll but also a blooper reel. The song is interrupted not once but TWICE with badly written joyless plodding 3-minute sketches. Just play the damn song.

If he really wanted to, Tyler the Creator could effortlessly nail this genre of video. We're also fans of everyone involved in "Oprah's Bank Account," which makes the experience all the more frustrating. DaBaby taints his previously flawless videography; Drake removes any doubt of his entirely nonexistant comedic acting chops. Somebody should get fired for this one.

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